Queen’s Jubilee Celebration

As a long standing and committed Royalist I must take this opportunity to wish everyone (especially Her Majesty the Queen) a happy and delightful Queen’s Jubilee Celebration :-)

 

The bunting is due to go up tomorrow and wifey has already worn her Jubilee Celebration hat to work. Well done bless her (wifey that is), and well done to Her Majesty the Queen on both a good innings as our Sovereign, and for doing a blinking good job to boot.  

Olympic Flame

"Go on officer, please give me a light".  Well done to all of those that ran with the Olympic flame from Aberystwyth.  I dragged myself out of bed nice and early and was met with a pleasant surprise.  The position that I took along the promenade was exactly where four friends were stood and none of them are connected to one another! So I had a nice chat here and there, but had to keep apologising as I turned to the next person to chat to.  What a lovely start to what turned out to be a lovely day.  Made a little bit better with my Canon 600D and it's tilt screen that allowed me to hold the camera at extended arm height and shoot some shots from above the crowd.

Now don't get me wrong; I'm not a 100% happy as Lord Thingy and Boris messed up the 2012 Olympics for me and it might as well have been on another Continent.  That is until the flame came to Aberystwyth. When I say 'messed up' I don't mean that they went out of their way to nobble me.  Mind you, it does feel like that when our multiple bids for 5 family members materialised into 2 boxing tickets.  You don't have to be a maths genius to know that 5 into 2 doesn't exactly go, and I don't go to the Olympics either.  So it's a good job that Boris got re-elected and the Olympics came to Victoria Terrace in Abersytwyth on a lovely sunny day.  I waited for ages for the above shot while leaning to support my 300mm zoom lens.  I knew that if a few people moved out of shot and the torch carrier turned towards the policeman; then there was room for a caption, e.g. the one above or even "go on, tell us the way". 

My highlight of the day was taking a photograph of 'The Sun' photographer, taking a photograph of a policewoman and the above torch carrier.  Everyone expected it to make 'The Sun' tomorrow, but once the torch bearer got invited to sit on the Police bike, it was down hill for any other likely photographs.  The good news is; I may not be at the Olympics this time around, but at least I now have a little bit of the Olympic fever. Oh, unless of course Boris or the Lord want to send some free tickets my way?  You can find me on Facebook, I'm the Roger Bennett (AKA Lord Crindau) with the dark photograph holding a pint of beer. 

The reference to Lord Crindau being how someone addressed me in London over the weekend. "Well", he said, "I never thought that I would meet Lord Crindau".  Nice one matey, I thoroughly enjoyed that comment and it was nice to meet someone from St Julians in Newport South Wales.

Olympics

My Olympic money was here,

But now it’s gone,

For what and when I don’t know,

But for others there is none.

Oh London 2012,

You confused me with your ruse,

Not to sell the tickets,

Even to your muse.

I thought it was a celebration,

Chance to see the best,

Let’s hope there’s no black market,

But bidding like the rest.

Track, field or equestrian,

The system doesn’t say

My mind was blank,

But yet you made me pay.

How I longed to be there for you, 

At this feast of sport,

But now watching television,

I shan’t be your cohort.

Roger Bennett (all rights reserved)

Ford GT40 at Monaco

Another YouTube Video of the Monaco Themed Scalextric Layout that I built. This time with wifey driving a Ford GT40 and a nice view of the bench made out of card and stuck down onto a metal base so that the magnetic biker figures from the States stand up nicely when posed in front of the bench.  I am particularly proud of the bench model as it is all made out of card and each of the slots in the concrete ends that house the planks were cut with one go only and through thick card to boot! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6kubNgU1dYQ

Monaco Themed compact Scalextric layout

A video has now been uploaded to my Facebook and Youtube pages showing the compact Monaco Themed Scalextric Slot Car Layout that has taken in excess of 300 hours to scratchbuild over the last two years.  It sounds a lot; but really it's a bit of time here and there.  The layout was a gift for a good friend of mine.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61Xp7QtRYeQ&feature=youtu.be

The yacht was a rebuild from a wrecked hull and includes matchsticks with two holes drilled through them inserted into cut ice cream tub plastic and both components glued into holes drilled into the decking.  The barrier edge is a long piece of picture frame wire that has been unthreaded into a single strand and then pushed through the holes in the matchsticks.  Nearly all of the items on the Monaco Themed Scalextric Slot Car layout are scratchbuilt from card.  Usually the type of card that you find on the back of writing pads.  PVA is the main glue, but there is some contact adhesive to stick down some of the figures.  Other figures are magnetic based and these stand on strategically placed metal washers or strips of metal that are glued into position around the layout.

The video was shot by yours truly while the speeding car is driven by wifey

Scalextric Vanwall and NINCO Lexus

An enjoyable part of the Scalextric layout construction and scenery and building model making is the photography.  This image of a HORNBY Hobbies Ltd (Scalextric) Vanwall MM/C/87 Number 1 was taken using the monochrome setting on a Canon 600D Digital SLR using a f1.8 50mm prime lens.  

This image of a modified NINCO Lexus 430c gt500 with slot it alloys and older nc2 motor was also taken on the 600D but on this occasion using the 50mm prime lens with the camera set on landscape mode and a table lamp housing a daylight bulb just above and to the right hand side of the scene.

Questions and Models

I have added a new Question to the 'Question' tab, and some text and an image to the 'Models' tab. 

I have an awful lot of questions at the moment and not all of them are being answered.  They certainly cannot all be uploaded here, which is a shame really, as a burden shared is a burden halved.  Maybe this is why I have been so immersed in the model making.  Vigorously building this or that out of card, plastic, sand, and glue.

Activities keep the mind busy and deflect attention away from the unwelcome thoughts that so often intrude upon us.  I have a very good friend who is suffering badly with mental ill health at the moment. I can't really say to him; "I know how you feel".  The comment would be inappropriate as the bottom line is with these invisible illnesses; none of us know how another person is coping or the impact or events that pushed them into where they now find themselves.  All we can do is to be there to support our friends in whatever way is relevant to the circumstances.  For that reason I would like to thank those that from time to time, support me.  One thing that I have noticed about the dark days is that you can inadvertently let your friends slip by.  With that in mind it was lovely to hear from Simon the other evening.  Good friends keep in touch and don't have a balancing of the books system.  It doesn't matter if the other person has been silent, they still pick up and try.  It was nice to catch up with Simon so I shall now try to meet up with another friend called Adam. 

I shall also continue to ring the various telephone numbers of someone else and hope that at some point he picks up as well.  Yes it can be dark, but it doesn't have to be lonely.

Claire Squires' Just Giving Page

The Claire Squires story is heartbreaking. Her brother died young and Claire was doing her bit to raise money for the Samaritans when she passed away towards the end of the 2012 London Marathon aged only 30. Claire had intended to raise £500 for the Samaritans and the flood of donations since her untimely death has pushed that amount to almost £500,000 at the time of writing. I suspect that I am not alone in hoping that the Samaritans set up a Trust Fund in Claire’s memory so that her contribution is still helping the charity in 30 years time rather than the monies being absorbed as a windfall now. It would be nice to see a lasting legacy from a person who understood that we are all on this earth for what we do for others. That would mean that Claire’s early death is not totally in vain and her family and close friends can take some comfort from the positive outcomes for Claire’s chosen charity the Samaritans. So why not track down the Claire Squires ‘just giving’ page linked to the Samaritans and send off a few pounds as well. Many of us are, or have been effected by mental ill health and those who are not, probably know at least two or three persons who have suffered a mental health setback in their life. Claire ran the Marathon and tried to raise money for a charity that is close to many people’s heart. I have rung the Samaritans once in my life, and it’s nice to know that when you need someone to talk to, there are systems in place that can help others when they need that help the most. I gave the few pounds left in my Paypal account. It's no big shakes as it was only a small amount. But if lots of people do the same then it all adds up.

I had a social network message off a friend yesterday asking about the snow.

“What snow?” thought me, until I stepped out into the freezing cold arctic conditions and above the village could see the 'white of those hills there yonder'. Now that what comes of being ill; you lose track of what's happening around you. Well that’s not strictly true as you may acquire a better understanding of what’s going on in the wider world through television and the internet. But I’m writing about that bubble around your personal space and the interaction between the person and their community and the local environment.

I could have sworn that when I last went outside I was wearing shorts and sandals and Mr Tister and I were enjoying an ice cream on the promenade. But then again I was just jabbering away to two family members, before I realised that they weren’t in the house!

The other clarification means that we have to return to the ice cream story. You see, Mr Tister was enjoying the frothy cone, but I was just looking on longingly and wondering if my pension could stretch to getting myself one, given the Government’s hike in taxation and the zero annual occupational pension increase that is currently my lot.

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate getting a pension, and I also understand that if I had left in 2005 when I pleaded to go, then it would probably be a lot less. But ‘no increase’ every year doesn’t mean ‘no pay rise’, it means a pay loss. Not even a ‘pay freeze’ because while the pension hasn’t gone up, the actual cost of living seems to increase exponentially and those increases seems to occur monthly.

Strategy and not Tactics

Can someone please start teaching the Apprentices the difference between Tactics and Strategy before the programme airs each Season. Maybe it could be part of the introduction and health and safety package.

And while we are at it, could someone check out the behind the scenes footage before the FIRING. You know the sort of thing “I wasn’t too impressed by your behaviour when you done so and so and for that reason you are fired”. Because in the real world people are more often than not pushed out for what they say, do, stand for, rather than for failing a task or being a pivotal part of that task failure.

Remember Trayvon Martin

Remember Trayvon Martin the lad going about his lawful business. Trayvon was carrying sweets and a soft drink for his brother.

It’s not a Black and White thing, it’s a right and wrong thing.

In an ideal world young Trayvon wouldn’t have died. But the world we live in isn’t an ideal world. So let’s hope that his untimely and unnecessary death has a significant and long lasting impact on the United States of America. The world leader in many issues and yet a third world country in many respects especially those concerning ethnicity. God Bless America and let’s pray for Trayvon, and also pray for his family and friends who now suffer his departure.

The Swim Dr

Well the doctor says that exercise amongst other things is important for mental ill health and is pleased that I get up nice an early each weekday morning and toddle off to the swimming pool.

This week I managed 32, 32, 32, and 40 lengths. This is all well and good until I got chatting again to ‘Doctor’ Georgie. Now Dr Georgie as you can see by observing the single quotation marks is not a ‘real’ doctor. No, far from it, you see Dr Georgie is my Swim Doctor and pretty encouraging too. Or is that pretty and encouraging too?

So I was pretty chuffed with my 136 lengths this week and a lot of physical exercise outside of the swimming pool. That is until Georgie mentioned swimming 220 lengths today in a little over one and a half hours. Ok, so she was a tad angry, when swimming that is and not when talking to me. But come on folks get your head around the statistic; 220 lengths in 90 minutes. That’s better than life saving swim test standard and its being sustained time and time again.

That’s 220 lengths against my best ever at about 85 lengths. I manage 40 in just under 40 minutes; probably a good 38 minutes but that’s a tough session. But in order to reach 120 lengths let alone 220 lengths I would have to swim at my best and sustain that rhythm for one and a half hours i.e. three times longer than normal. Not on your nelly, nope, no way, not a chance. Then having done the impossible I would still come in 100 lengths short. So Dr Georgie I doff my cap to you, you little dolphin you.

Black and White Right and Wrong

"It's not a Black and White THING - It's a RIGHT and WRONG thing", well said

The Wedding

I went along to a wedding last night. Well that’s not quite true; I actually attended my first ever Classical Music Concert with the BBC National Orchestra of Wales playing amongst other things Tchaikovsky’s Violin Concerto.

My take on the pre-concert talk was that musical interpretation is an individual thing that is wholly dependent upon the listener making up his or her mind. The accomplished speaker explained amongst many other things that there are no right or wrongs, and you clap or otherwise express yourself whenever and however you wish. Now that’s all well and good but I didn’t want to get duffed-up by the other 498 serious music goers or in this case the Wedding Party.

I know that it was a Wedding as the gifted soloist Vilde Frang played the part of the Bride extremely well indeed. The emotion, the centre stage presence and when she played, oh when she played, it was pure bliss. I also know that one of the First Violins was the Groom. How do I know this you ask? Simply because we all know that the Groom arrives at the Church before the Bride and struts around while everyone else looks on.

Now I am not quite sure if Jac van Steen was the Vicar or the Father of the Bride. In the end I opted for the latter as van Steen guided everyone accurately through the event and often looked on as the proud father. Indeed the relationship between van Steen and Vilde appeared to be intense.

I also know that in ‘Love Actually’ speak; the Second Lobsters were the bridesmaids. “The Second Lobsters?” I hear you say. Well yes, these were the two Violinists thrown to the extremes of the venue to make way for the Bride and the others as and when the Bride entered the Church.

Now Matthew Hardy on Timpani was without any doubt whatsoever the DJ at the after service party. Matthew changed his sticks as frequently as records and like all good DJ’s; although the music was glorious you never knew that he was there. But when he had something to say, then it was something truly worth listening to.

The Double Basses played by Dominic Worsley, Albert Dennis, Christopher Wescott, Tim Older, Claire Whitson-Dibble, and Richard Gibbons were the waiters. Each and every course served up on time and as one. “Who?” you ask then, was the Best Man. Well that had to be Donal Bannister on Bass Trombone. Anyone as nice as this, able to give such a good pre-concert talk and still manage to deliver his 34 notes on time and without drama, deserves without any doubt whatsoever to be the Best Man. So what about the Church Choir? Well that one is easy too. It was the eight Cellos’ played magnificently by John Senter et al. Who were the girl friends, who were the mates and what about the ushers? Well the girly girls were of course Eilidh and Sarah, they were definitely the friends of the Bride. Whereas Ian Fisher and gang all on Horns; would have been with the Groom. The Ushers were drawn from the Trumpet players and those who had mastered the Oboes.

It was a delightful Wedding, but alas like the best of weddings it all came too quickly to an end. Well done BBC NOW, it looks as if you have grabbed another convert.


Now hot on the Budget news we have to convince the Coalition Government that the ‘Arts’ is not an add on. It is not something to cut at a whim, as its importance extends beyond any single event or series of events. No indeed, classical music delivered by a fine orchestra is an essential part of who and what we are.

Music like Maths is the centre of everything and it is undoubtedly what we need in order to flourish. So when you are popping notes into that Red Box next time Mr Chancellor; please have the common sense to support music and help make this Country a better place and the lives of its taxpaying residents more fulfilled.

Working Budget

Well the doctor mentioned that I hadn’t got over my 1998 breakdown let alone the others that followed. So there were no surprises there, but it was still worth the trip to see the new surgery and have a nice chat and cry with someone outside of the family circle. My long term mental ill health is a bit like the Budget really, the same old stuff, but illustrated in a slightly different way each year.

I thought that the Wallace and Gromit Budget gag was very funny but underhand. I know what it was supposed to mean, but I also understood the innuendo. Well done to the Coalition Government on the intended broadband improvements across the UK as that is indeed what a modern industrial society should have. Oh, but where's our industry gone? Probably where our Gold Reserves went; down the plug ole.

I like the idea of the rich paying the most and the poor paying the least, especially now that I’m on an Occupational Pension. 45% of an awful lot isn’t that much, whereas any taxation on very little is a burden. Mind you 50% of an awful lot wasn’t much either, but that figure unfortunately no longer exists. The grannies seem to have come off badly and that is a surprise. The ‘Granny Tax’ wasn’t the kind of publicity the coalition would have been looking forward too when the contents of the Red Box were being compiled and leaked. Then again, if the contents stayed in the box until the day, there is less chance of someone building a comprehensive argument quickly. So lesson for the future; keep the budget secret as it doesn’t pay to share in advance.

The thing that really got me and I hope that I am not alone in this one; is the poor maths. Now I’m no Oxbridge maths genius like my mate, but I do know that 20% of a £600 increase in basic rate taxation level equals £120 and not £200+ as quoted by someone on the box. So I save £120 per year which is an extra £10 per month. Very nice indeed, except I live in West Wales where the public transport system is crap and the fuel prices are extortionate. So while the rest of you complain about fuel costs, we actually feel the ridiculously high costs and continue pay the most. Note to the Chancellor, please introduce a national fuel cap and stop the thieving B’s from robbing us blind out in the sticks. You opt for public transport to keep your costs down, but we can’t use public transport because like I say its crap. They stole the trains to South Wales and the ones that go the long way around through England aren’t that nice or that reliable. The buses seem to be worse. So there goes my tenner then.

My basic arithmetic also means that I know that £5 something per week extra for a pensioner is £250 per year and not like someone said this on the box; £500.

With all of this in mind, maybe the next budget could set aside some money for the poor politicians to have much needed maths lessons. Apparently these can be accessed by schools on line with providers living in India rather than working in the classroom. Good job that we are getting the improved broad band then, as all of those that need the maths update won’t even have to step outside the House of Commons.

Thank You

A big THANK YOU to all the family and friends who rallied around and gave me support this week following the traumatic events of last Saturday while I was in the Capital for a break while feeling down. I won't single anyone out, but I really appreciate the numerous FaceBook messages, the texts, the phone calls, and the meets for Coffee and a walk. I really needed the support and I truly appreciate that friends and family were there. Diolch yn fawr iawn i chi.

Blue Lips

Phew, back home from South Wales and so glad to be back in the safety of my home environment. Strange really as had to get away from this house as the last week or so has been so stressful and we needed to plant me somewhere where I could grow and avoid the then current stressors in my life. Just when you think it’s all ok, everything goes pear shaped. Or as a qualified Strategist I know that no plan survives first engagement with the enemy.

As you all know I believe in fate. Or as the Street Pastor said in Cardiff after the event, “it was the guiding hand of God”. That comes as no surprise as I do pray daily. We had planned to pop along to the cinema check out the film times and the then scurry away for a meal to return when the chosen film was due to begin. We wandered inside at the electronic listings, and we wandered outside to check out the posters and the paper time. This to-ing and fro-ing went on for a bit until we stuck on a choice between three Thrillers. I got my way and we opted for that one. Then wifey suggested that we caught the film straight away and went for the meal later. Now given wifey’s willingness to throw her two main choices by the wayside, and opt for one of three thrillers, agreeing to the early evening film was the least that I could do. So folks, we shouldn’t have been where we were, and we could have been walking out at any of the varying times each film ended.

So why on earth do I walk outside and turn right instead of left (where we normally turn) and end up saving the life on my 6th victim? This time it was a young girl lying on the ground surrounded by people; who wifey and I clocked simultaneously and I’m already moving away briskly as wifey shouts “go!”

My first and obvious question was to ask if an ambulance has been called, to which one of the bystanders asks “do you think that we need an ambulance?” I mean come on folks, young woman on ground, partly in gutter, hardly moving. You don’t actually call for a taxi do you? A few seconds later and I am engaging the Ambulance Trust in my first of three calls that evening. During the first, the operator answers but no one from the Ambulance Trust. Indeed the operator told me that he was trying another number and still no answer. I gave up and continued rendering first aid and wifey instead used her phone to dial 999 as well. Which was also met with no success when wifey handed her phone to me. The onlookers in a state of shock as the condition of the young woman deteriorated. None of them knew what to do. My third phone call was when the Ambulance Trust rang me back on my phone and I explained the circumstances and gave the address. As I stood to locate the street name a voice said, “no pulse, she’s stopped breathing”.

Wifey mentions that when the victims pulse stopped and her lips turned blue and she looked like death, I said "Oh shit, here we go" as I passed my phone to a bystander to finish the call with the Ambulance Trust. I heard the bystander say something like, “do you want assistance, they are saying do you need assistance?” but I was already rolling by then. The thing that struck me the most was that the young victim was the Spit of Resusci-Annie: her face and hair shape, body size, age, facial expression, and right down to the white neat teeth as the lips separated from the mouth. It was all extremely emotional for me, but also almost like being in the classroom. I don’t know if the violent jolt as I moved her briskly from the Recovery Position to the resuscitate position and tilted the head, or the finger scoop for debris inside her mouth where maybe the forcefulness of the action caught the roof of the mouth or the back of her throat and thereby prompted her brain to react, but whatever it was one eyelid moved as I withdrew my finger. I found the pulse before putting her back into the Recovery Position where she started to wretch without any vomit coming out. Maybe she was choking when originally in the Recovery Position and either the violence of the movement to resuscitate or the finger scoop dislodged debris. Or, equally credible is that the high level of intoxication meant that her systems had closed down and the movement and the scoop prompted them to restart. I can’t be certain for sure. But I do know that her best friend had thought that she had died in the street and was crying; but it wasn’t going to happen on my watch.

I’m upset while typing this Blog, but the story has to be told as others should learn First Aid and be ready for the day when your help will inevitably be needed. I had my first of many nervous breakdowns in 1998. That was a combination of stress and anxiety and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). The PTSD was brought about during a First Aid situation with a family member. My continuous poor mental health and the flashbacks of the PTSD means that saving victim number six was extremely traumatic for me. It happened on Saturday and I am still crying today some 48 hours later. But you have to talk about it to help recover from the trauma. It’s a strange thing when you are part of a good positive happening but so emotional that the event makes you feel unwell and upset. Then again you can’t walk past someone when the guiding hand of God puts you next to them and say “Sorry lady, but if I save your life, I will make myself ill.” So come on folks, learn some First Aid and share some of the burden. And if you can’t learn the First Aid then at least call an Ambulance.

My eldest is worried that I am still ill as she seen firsthand how I was affected by Saturday nights action. I shall say to her and to others; don’t worry, I shall get better – it’s just that I don’t know when. Or as wifey says, “you sure got f@cked up working for that lot.”


Ps if you survived post Ambulance and Hospital, then I would love to hear from you. Find me on Facebook as I know your name as I asked your friend at the scene and used your name every time I talked to you while waiting for the Ambulances to turn up. I say plural as like London buses when you need one there is none about and then two come rolling along.

Mental ill health

Mental ill health is a terrible thing and I am glad that I can talk and write about the three nervous breakdowns that I had since suffering Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in 1998. Maybe, just maybe some of the things that I have previously written about in this Blog along with this entry might help others to come to terms with how they feel:

I suppose that there are those out there who will incorrectly contend that there can’t be much wrong with him if he can write about that ‘stuff’. But that’s the point, the writing and the model making and the swimming and the art work and the reading and the ancestry researching and the occasional DIY are simply multiple techniques to avoid facing the demons.

These numerous ‘deflection from reality’ activities include this Blog. They are the means of deflecting thoughts away from the occurrences and the outcomes and the dark days. And they can be dark as the last week has shown when I realised the descent and wifey commented upon it to others. The smiley face came back yesterday evening and I am looking forward to a weekend of de-stressing after what has been yet another stressful time for me. The thing is, what you find stressful doesn’t necessarily correlate to what I find stressful. For example; I hate opening envelopes and accepting or making telephone calls. It is a real fear and my palms become sweaty as I begin each time to experience flight behaviour. Now if you have never experience mental ill health let alone wide awake daytime flashbacks, then you probably cannot comprehend what I am writing about. In my world what to you is normal is abnormal, and some abnormal things are quite normal.

I used to be a compulsive obsessive. Thankfully my former employer paid for high end counselling when I had my third breakdown and the counsellor explained and helped me with techniques to suppress that behaviour. But this is also an important point, just because you don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there. Because folks it’s only suppressed, i.e. just below the surface and ready to strike at any time that I drop my guard.

You might be thinking; “oh why is he writing about this today?” Well the truth is mental ill health, unlike a broken leg or broken arm does not carry the outward signs of a plaster cast. So when there are gaps in the blog, and we know that statistically there are gaps and this is why it is called “The Weekender” and not “The daily”, you can rest assured that all is ok, but maybe I am doing one of the other numerous deflection things or having some darker moments.

One of the deflection activities of course as mentioned on numerous occasions is the swimming. This particular activity has triple purpose in that it is good for the mental health, good for the physical health, and by attending Monday to Friday and at 0730 I am able to bring about weekly structure and focus to something that is otherwise an absent void since I ceased working over two years ago. Those that think that I should be working need not worry as society does not support me and I simply struggle along on my Occupational Pension. I paid my taxes for 32 years and I don’t get a handout. Not anything, nought, nothing, zilch, zero, nil.

Although my government funded handouts are nil, my arithmetic is still good. This is mainly because of the swimming. You see some people will argue that the swimming is bad for mental health because while you are trawling up and down the pool you are also thinking and of course they also believe that ill people only think of bad things. Well that’s not the case for me, as the only thinking that I am capable of doing when swimming is to concentrate on my stroke, remember when to breath, remember how to breath, occasionally think about using my legs, and repeat counting. One, one, one , one; means that I remember when I turn around that I have just completed one length. As is thirty four, thirty four, thirty four, thirty four. You see as a Compulsive Obsessive I need to know how many lengths that I am doing each time. Although, with grateful thanks to the counsellor I no longer maliciously record these lengths in a book each day. For clarity the Compulsive Obsessive is not about swimming or counting and is far more complex and surreal than I would want to mention here today. Then again when you think about it and hone in on the detail, you will recognise that the counting continuously during each length, the thinking about the stroke, thinking about when and how to breath and the other patterns that occur are in many ways part of the deflection techniques. I.e. by doing all of that which I do, I’m not thinking of the things that hurt. So there’s the deflecting the stuff that needs deflecting, and there’s also deflecting when deflecting.

The strange thing is, when I started swimming I used to have constant panic attacks. Hence the need to think about when and how to breath otherwise it’s hey presto and some young attendant in the water to assist yours truly. I wonder if there is an underlying association with water, as the majority of my wide awake flashbacks have occurred when I’m in the shower. Mmmm, it’s a strange world. Bring on the weekend and coffee in Cafe Nero, a chance to say hello to my friends in Cardiff and some time with the family.

Costa Avventuriero

With the heading 'Costa' those who know me would expect that I am about to write a few paragraphs on the high street coffee brand. Alas my friends, nothing could be further from my thoughts at this dreadful time.

With the Costa Allegra now under tow following a fire and loss of power in the Indian Ocean, we should all start wondering what on earth is going on with the cruise line industry and the further inevitable and damaging fallout for this type of holiday.

This catastrophe has occurred only one month and a bit after the sinking of the Costa Concordia with the loss of 25 lives. Some can claim run aground as one commentator recently did, but in my world on its side, holed and people dead equals a sinking. Worse still most of us recognise that that bad news sort of comes in threes. The ‘sods law’ of events suggests that a third happening will happen soon. It is inevitable, not necessarily for Costa, but somewhere involving a cruise liner. To be quite blunt, this second event so soon after the first one, suggests that sailing on the high seas (or the low seas close to land for that matter) has become a risky business for the holiday of a lifetime tribe. Of which I am one.

I believe that the British ship the Britannic sank not so long after her sister ship the Titanic and that there may have been a third liner. If not a third, then maybe the Titanic and the Britannic belonged to the then Olympic class of ships. The point being that the ‘3’ thing is an historical happening. It is not something new, and no one should be surprised when the third ship runs aground, sinks, blazes away, or otherwise meets its doom.

This storyboard has clearly demonstrated the urgent need for further regulation and safeguards in the maritime industry especially that involving tourism and the high volume transportation of fee paying guests. I am at a loss why there is no back-up system to restore power, and how the circumstances could have been allowed to occur that could disable all systems as a result of a fire. With 32 years experience in the fire industry, and a First Class Fire Engineering and Management Degree to boot, it beggars believe that ship design could be so poor. What really concerns me however is that I suspect that the fundamental flaws are not restricted to the Costa brand and could be replicated far and wide. It’s just that Costa is now taking the big hits whereas others may be sailing on the theme of; ‘but for the grace of god go I’. That’s not a case of trying to paint everyone with the same brush, but rather flagging up to the powers that be, that an urgent review of maritime safety is now needed to ensure that there is not an avoidable colossal loss of life.

Life safety regulations in the United Kingdom have all too often been a stable door reaction to the horse that has bolted. On this occasion there is opportunity to step up to the mark before the big event. That’s not belittling the loss of 25 lives, but the worry about the loss of 4,000 lives when their deaths could have been foreseen and prevented.

If the cruise line Costa brand survives; then long term maybe they could consider naming a future ship the Costa ‘Avventuriero’ as nothing seems to be straightforward for those that have recently booked a cruise with this particular company. In the short term maybe Costa need to undertake a significant review of its products and delivery and thereby restore customer confidence. For all those glowing in the sidelines and thanking that it’s not their fleet; the same review of products and delivery is also urgently needed. In all cases it must not be a back patting exercise and the reviews need to be independent so that the painful observations are made and the painful questions are asked.

Model Making

Not all Cemeteries are a bad thing. I like making models from waste materials and the like.

This model is a gift to someone who made me smile when he mentioned that his daughter chatted to him at a crucial moment during a task and I thought that it was lovely that he let the task slip away and instead spent the time responding to his daughter.

You see; nothing is as important as family and that’s a fact. There are more photographs of this model in the modelling section tab at the top of this Blog. Click on the tab and then scroll down to see the images.

The Gift

Well here is a BIG thank you to the lovely AUNTY Janet and the equally lovely AUNTY Eileen back in South Wales. Because of their kindness I have now bought myself Winsor & Newton Artists quality Chinese white, Quinacridone Magenta, and Cadmium Lemon with a Derwent Classic 56 page 165gsm acid free water colour book on order. The new and much needed acquisitions bulge my Winsor & Newton Artist’s water colour set to breaking point. I mean there is no more space left in the tin.

Thank goodness for the lovely Brian and Madeleine in the Art Shop on Pier Street Aberystwyth for the advice that they gave me and their generosity in handing me a Winsor & Newton Artists’ Water Colour hand painted colour chart. I have sort of spread bet my colours across the available range. It would be nice to have them all, but that’s not going to happen with the pension. But what I do have is a fair representation of the range of colours and I can now crack on with the 28th of the illustrations that I am currently producing for simple enjoyment.

The ‘Chinese white’ was an essential requirement for the three illustrations as each one involves white areas or depicting white lettering. Now I have to save up some dosh for a couple of the brilliant ‘JP Perkins’ water colour brushes. Pure sable and pure bliss to use, but mine alas are wearing away. All in all this has been a great month, physically and more importantly mentally. Maybe the settling down is due to a stress free period and the relaxation a few hours of painting each day brings. For these reasons the new paints and the paper are extremely well received.

Better still, it’s not a bad result at all for a month when I'm broke :-)

Exercise

Well today was the day of days. It turned out to be a compendium of physical and mental exercise. 52 lengths in the pool followed by a 10 minute sauna. Then the library for some ancestry research followed by a good read in a nice large but quiet room. Followed by pancake practice (nope not the mixing and the tossing, just the eating) and then chess club this evening.

Which in itself is not that remarkable, except that I haven't been to chess club for 14 years since I suffered the first of my numerous nervous breakdowns. I lost all of the games, but to be quite blunt, I couldn't care less. You see, I played and enjoyed and part of the enjoyment was about going along to play. The only thing wrong; there wasn't a cup of coffee in sight. Full, spilled or otherwise, nope, zero, nothing. Now I wonder if Costa would let a chess club meet there? 1.e4 e5, 2.f4 fun, oh Happy Days :-)

The triple three lady and the spreading coffee

The only thing that I have that can match the four pencils and the four fingers of the last few Blogs; is the four unintentional extra lengths in the pool this morning. Gosh it was cram packed in there, and yet again a fool tried to swim backstroke. Unreal I know, but there you have it. Twenty five people in the water and all swimming lengths and one little lady swim’s without being able to see where she is going and can’t manage a straight line. Phew, it’s enough to wind you up. But then again I am a bit of a cool customer when it comes to problems.

If you don’t believe me, then track down and ask the ‘triple three lady’ from Costa. A lovely thing from North Wales who like me has three daughters. So that’s two of the number 3 sequences. The third number ‘3’ being the number of sugars that she brought me when she bought me the coffee that she insisted on buying. Now don’t get me wrong, I like a nice looking pleasant woman, and I like my coffee, and I also like free coffee. So the unnecessary sugar is just a story filler that fits in with the other two three’s if you get my drift.

Anyway, there I was engrossed in the latest of my ‘three on a go at any one time’ reads (two about Passchendaele in the Great War and one about the official history of MI5). Oops, there’s another ‘3’ then, so it’s four three and not three three’s if you look closely enough. The 300 odd pages one was balancing partly on the edge of the table and resting on my reading glasses case. When the vision approached me and asked if she could sit down. I mean, what is a hot blooded man going to say. “No lady that seat is taken, and while you are at it, please leave me alone to read another 30 pages of this historical tome with the Germanic slant”. Nope, not on your Nelly. The book was closed as quick as you could say “Jumping Jack Flash”, or in this case, "Yes, please do”.

This of course makes a nice story but doesn’t necessarily link into my temperament comments at the start of this Blog entry. No, there must be more say you. Well of course you are right. There were no flaying fingers in sight, she sat calmly and did not practice the backstroke, but alas she did hit the ‘sweet spot’. Gosh, I was super impressed and when the lovely lady from the North made a lasting impression on me. There is no getting away from it, offspring co-incidences aside, we are certainly kindred spirits. We share a liking for the corner and a liking for a glass of water with the coffee. Unfortunately as her hand moved eloquently across the table while holding the water, the glass, so gingerly, touched the glass containing her hot drink. Whoosh, and there was a total disintegration of the second static vessel with shards of glass swimming in a volume of coffee. Some of the drink on my new book, some inside my glasses case and on the lenses of my designer reading glasses, a lot on my trousers and shoes. But not a blink of an eye or a harsh word from me. As the eternal gentleman I played down the situation and tried my best to put her at ease. I probably didn’t do as well as I thought as within a few minutes of buying me a drink, she was off on her way.

The second lady from the north to make a lasting impression on me, the other was back in Africa.

Mr Remington and the Flying Fingers

With the gang back and the car broke it has been a weekend without exercise and we all know the importance of physical exercise to aid mental health. So quite late at night; I decided that I would get up at 0715 hours the next morning and pop along to the swimming pool. This would have been OK if I had thought about it early enough to get my stuff ready and have a shave the night before. But alas the witching hour came and went before the thought of swimming had occurred. So there I was early in the morning fumbling round the room looking for clothes and my long lost swimming trunks and towel and with every movement making noises that were likely to disturb the grandchildren there was no way that I could fit in a shave.

Fitting in things is something I was not thinking of when I arrived at the pool. Indeed, I should have been thinking that way, because as I stepped through the door from the changing room to poolside; I had to rapidly think of ways of fitting myself into a lane. I mean, how on earth do so many people get up so early and only do so on the day that I need a swim? Luckily I caught a break and as I popped into the water, someone the other end of the lane next to the ladder, popped out. This was pretty cool for me as I was now tucked in against the wall and could safely swim up and down or 'trawl' as I call it. Now I know that it was busy, but why did everyone want to swim with and against me when there was a perfectly good lane next door? “Mr Popular or what”, thought I as the first ten and then twenty lengths were done.

I had a few brushes with the other swimmers, there was the chap who just avoided me, the one who swam at me, and the one who swam in front of me until my front crawl touched his ankle. I mean, come on folks, I am in the inside lane tight against the wall. LEAVE ME ALONE! But want I don’t get is the lady doing the backstroke in a crowded pool. Yes, you may think that you move in perfect harmony with tight arms neatly oscillating. When in fact, what actually faced others in the pool was the dance of the flaying hands and flying fingers. As tight as I was to the wall, the inconsiderate act struck me across my face and down my right cheek but thankfully I had my swimming goggles on and my eyes were safe. Do backstroke by all means, but start doing the lottery as well, and go and buy yourself a private pool. Or swim a stroke that includes looking ahead, so that you can swim straight and not strike others.

Smarting from my physical assault, I was aware of my unshaven look. Not a cool look, like those male models have who wear designer clothes. No this is the over 50 in need of a shave look. It then occurred to me that my trusty Remington shaver was in a pouch inside my swimming bag. Now this was a long shot as the thing had last been charged up some two and a half years ago. Even as I unzipped the pouch I was thinking shall I shan’t I. Unbelievably it sprung into life. The light may have been RED but the blades whirred. I even shaved left and right in case the thing died early, but I should have had a bit more confidence as the Remington brought about a close shave. This of course was a nice end to a session that had included the ‘flaying hands’ of the inconsiderate. Four pens from the previous Blog entry, and four fingers with this one, so what on earth would happen next?

Mythical Dragons

I have just accidentally found a particularly unusual propelling pencil that was made for/by Wyvern in the 1940's. It's very desirable for me and something that I want to add to my collection. I then go and stumble on four more identical writing instruments over the next two days. It's sort of London Buses isn't it? None for ages and then a load turn up. My chances of owning one? Probably the same as my chances of winning the Euro Lottery.

Crazy Icicles

As forecast it was bitterly cold the other morning. The car should have taken ages to defrost but for some strange reason as cold as it was, there was no deep freeze. But the ground was frozen and the gauge showed -4 degrees at the 0730 pre-swim warm up. With this in mind I have to ask myself why the crazy young driver was overtaking a van while driving towards me on the main road running through the housing estate of Waunfawr? What a fool, I thought to myself as I applied my brakes carefully. Now careful is my middle name, which is a good job, because at -4 degrees you have to be careful. Once you slide it’s usually the other person that you kill.

Although the -4 degrees at 0730 didn’t come as a surprise, the -2 degrees post swim drive home was a big surprise. But not as big as a surprise as the idiots who were walking in the road instead of on the pavement opposite. I mean, it’s not as if the road had been gritted or that the pavement was really icy. I had to pause and think; “does cold weather bring out the silliness in people?” What I should have considered was “does the cold weather also make a fool aggressive?”

I popped out of a junction and with the road clear to the right hand side and took up a central position ready to pop into a gap in the flow of traffic coming from the left. But the next youngster of the day who had moved fast from the junction on the right, now started hitting their car horn and making aggressive gestures at me. Now why on earth would you do that?

Yes, I know that you life is important and that you want to get to where you are going because if you don’t make it in the next thirty seconds then you will die, but hey ho missy, just let the guy turn his car without the need for aggression. No, please save the nastiness for when you are at home with your family and partner. Because in my world, aggressive drivers, are simply aggressive people. Nasty when driving; nasty in life.

I almost immediately move off with the nasty young girl, well I think that it was a girl, having been held up by all of five seconds and still barbing. Her delay was brought about due to her speed, and her aggression was brought about for her desire for more speed. I wonder if she is an uninsured driver? Fools come as no surprise and aggressive nasty little people seem to be a thing brought about by today’s society. However the continual cold weather throughout that day came as a big surprise.

It all began with the -4 degrees that led to foolishness, then the -2 degrees and the nastiness and at the end of the day it was still only 0 degree. Although by then I had enjoyed separately a chat with five friends and a lovely coffee in Costa. So was it a day of ‘crazy icicles’ and is there a correlation between temperature and temper? I don’t really know if there is a correlation, but I do hope that a lot of people take a hot water bottle to be bed with them tonight and start to warm up. Oh, and I hope that the 0740 fool is caught and given a few good points before someone is hurt or killed, and that the 0900 aggressor can’t start her car tomorrow or the rest of the week, oh and next week as well. Now that would be justice, especially if we can also get those idiots to walk on the pavement.

The Godfather

My eldest will enjoy reading this Blog entry. It’s about the joy of electronic information and the catch up opportunities afforded by the Web. Her Godfather got in touch via that well known Social Network site yesterday. Now that was a shock as it must be nigh on twenty years since I last spoke to the Godfather. Well it must be twenty years as I had my first work related mental health episode in 1998 and that’s fourteen years ago.

The thing is I can’t pin down the exact date as I remember meeting up for a beer and a meal and cannot imagine that I would have travelled all the way from the coast for that. No, that get together must have been when we were living in the valleys. It would have still been a jaunt with a thirty six mile round trip, but not as onerous as from where we now live. If it was ‘from the Valleys’; then that dates the catch up at about twenty four years ago. I did try and meet again as I remember the impact that the row of wheelie bins had on me in the street when I called by and how nicely the table was laid when I peeked through the window in the absence of an answer.

The friendship at the time must have been good, as I’m not the type of chap who would pick any old person as a Godfather. I have always seen the duties as quite important. I try to keep in touch with my Goddaughter; and from time to time send a small gift for her daughter. My Goddaughter has a special place in my heart, and I suppose that this is one of those things that can sometimes fall by the wayside when people move away. Our lives are busy and time passes by so quickly. It’s not wholly our fault but we begin to neglect our responsibilities. I certainly neglected mine.

The strange thing is though, that although we are busy we find time online. At a time when there is so much going on, we somehow manage to interact more often and more remotely due to the astonishing advancement of computer systems. We now seem to be better informed. Most of us know what is going on, and what is happening to whom in ‘our village’. That being a social interaction of let’s say one hundred friends and family. Knowledge exchange, sometimes in small sound-bites is one of the big things about Social Networking. The interesting thing is though, that Electronic Social Network systems can have a duality of effect; they can lead to ‘dysfunctionality’ whereby people spend too much time on line and acquire a glut of almost false friends, in many ways like some form of trophy hunting, while paradoxically they can bring people back together. The Godfather still plays Chess whereas I don’t. Maybe if we ever move back to South Wales I can settle down with a beer or a glass of wine and play a game. Better still, maybe if Jeffers visits the Principality I can arrange an international. It could be billed; ‘the Godfather versus the African’, two friends who are Continents apart. But due to Social Networking I can now contact either at any time.

Deed Done

So I done the deed and ventured out in the cold weather all the way from the village and into town. "Why on earth did you do that", I hear you ask.

Well, because some tea-leaf has I believe taken my swimming goggles. Now; I suspect stolen rather than lost as there weren't many places to look. Plus of course I have asked twice at the venue in case they have been handed in. Mind you I met someone in town this afternoon who said that I should ask a third time. They advocate that I should ask yet again; just in case someone innocently took them home believing them to be theirs and then realise the mistake after the weekend.

Nevertheless, I had to buy another pair for the morning. No, option really you see. Because without the goggles it is a neck hurting 20 lengths, and with them it is 32 to 36 lengths and no strain. Mind you, just in case the person who found them does hand them in, I bought blue and not black. Well, it would be pointless having two pairs of black swimming goggles wouldn't it?

Coffee Making Tip of the Day

Coffee Making Tip of the Day No. (15) Of course the coffee machine isn’t just for coffee. Wifey has started enjoying her almost daily hot chocolate: Fresh water, when ready purge steamer using usual small china or heat resistant jug. Discard old water and run hot water through coffee machine without coffee holder and on into pre-warmed jug. Transfer this water to tall coffee/chocolate drinking glass. Put two coffee measurer of drinking chocolate powder into now empty jug. Run small amount of hot water through system into jug. Use a small spoon and mix the hot water and drinking chocolate powder to a paste. Top up the mixed paste in the small jug with hot water to desired amount and strength. Discard warming water from chocolate/coffee glass, and pour drinking chocolate content from the jug into the glass. Steam the mil and froth it up. Use clean coffee measurer to ‘spoon’ milk onto the drinking chocolate so that there is milk marbling on the top. Take a clean knife and scoop small amount of drinking chocolate from tin, place over the drink, and tap the knife so that the chocolate powder sprinkles down onto the milk. Serve and enjoy.

Coffee Making Tip of the Day

Coffee Making Tip of the Day No. (14) If you know me, then why not pop over to mine and enjoy a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Oh, and if you like yours brewed as an Espresso, then please bring along an Espresso cup; because I like my coffee long and slender. Better still, why not bring along your favourite blend for us to try out? At the moment mine is ‘Panama Boquete’. But then again not that long ago I was just as enthusiastic about ‘Breakfast Blend’. CAMRA eat your heart out, I can see a range of coffee being purchased, savoured, and sampled as lovingly as a good beer any day of the week. Mmmm, warm beer, now that’s a thought.

Coffee Making Tip of the Day

Coffee Making Tip of the Day No. (13) If you are meticulous with the cleaning as you go along, the only thing that you will be left to clean after enjoying your freshly brewed drink will be the coffee cup. Everything will be there nice and clean and waiting for the next time, but when that comes around; don’t forget to change the water! It may be my 13th ‘Coffee Making Tip of the Day’, but it won’t be unlucky for you! Clean fresh water, system purged, and raring to go. Mmmmm, lovely.

Sky Terry

I should be writing about the appalling John Terry Witch-hunt. That situation has been blown out of all proportions with far too many commentators having far too much to say. As usual in our modernised British Justice system, the condemnation will inevitably mean that the accused cannot receive a fair trial. I should be writing about ‘innocent until proven guilty’ as I too have faced more than one witch-hunt during my life. The second of which led directly to my second nervous breakdown. It would have been an enjoyable discourse or is that monologue? About the rights and wrongs of a society that allows its media to dictate the themes, and a media that seems to allow far too many to have a say rather than wait for the justice mechanism to revolve. Yes, it would have been a good-un; but instead I am writing about SKY News.

The folks at SKY News were right of course. As they predicated and as I mentioned earlier this week; it was -8 degree in Aberystwyth this morning. Ok, so it was the 0715 car pre-warm prior to swimming. But nevertheless it was also -8 degrees. In fact it was so cold that when I arrived at the pool, I noticed that my flip-flops were frozen along with my shower gel. Worse still I spotted that my swimming goggles were missing. They had obviously been left behind yesterday morning or had fallen out of my bag. Whatever the cause for their disappearance, we now know after asking two attendants and at the counter; that some tea-leaf has them in their possession. Quite sad really as Bloggers will recall that there was a period last year when I found three items on separate occasions and handed them in. These included an iPod, and a pair of swimming goggles. All of which were waiting to be reclaimed by what I suspect were their grateful owners.

You see folks; theft is theft whichever way you dress it up. Minor theft is still theft, and ‘finders keepers – losers weepers’ is also theft. If you are reading this Blog and you have found my goggles, then please do the right thing and hand them in. Please don’t blame your partner to maintain what I suspect is your unblemished record. Please don’t blame the newspapers for not writing about your alleged crime. No. Just do the right thing and hand them in. Just say that you meant to hand them in, and there was no one at the counter. There won’t be a witch-hunt, unless your name is Terry. The decision not to needlessly hunt you down and make you mentally ill, is mainly taken because at -8 degrees in Aberystwyth, it is simply too blinking cold. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Coffee Making Tip of the Day

Having just wifey a hot chocolate using my new coffee machine, I thought that it would be a good idea to take some more time out from the painting and instead post Coffee Making Tip of the Day No. (12) Stop the coffee machine when you have enough coffee in your cup and rather than pour the hot frothy milk from the jug into the coffee, instead ladle the milk into the cup on top of the coffee using the clean coffee measurer. This way you get a nice marbling on the top, some frothy taste, and an altogether nicer drink. Enjoy!

It's cold folks

As the weather bites; the sleepy hollow of Aberystwyth makes SKY News. You see folks the hills are all white and the temperature has plunged. It is -2 degrees today, but SKY has reported a forecast of -8 degrees for Aberystwyth this weekend. Now I know that this is no great shakes for my African friends in Canada. I mean for them, a daily temperature of -8 degrees would be positively warm. But here in Wales where the sheep’s coats are thin, this my friends is worrying news indeed.

I am well prepared with the heaters on in many of the rooms, including turning on the grand heater in the hallway. Now that doesn’t happen often because as a ‘pensioner’ money is tight and I’m not due a pay-rise for another three years. I have even ventured from the village and got in some much needed provisions. I now have in my cupboard; Perylene Maroon, Ultramarine Violet, and good old Winsor Blue (Red Shade). The hatches are battened down, and this old chap is going to plough on with the water colouring. There’s no getting away from it; painting and drawing helps mental health, so thank you ‘the cold wind from the East’. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Coffee Making Tip of the Day

Coffee Making Tip of the Day No. (11) Wash the steamer attachment and the coffee measuring spoon as the coffee is brewing. The best part of this tip is that I am sat here enjoying a cup of 'Panama Boquete Coffee'. It is a medium coffee that is stronger than the Breakfast Blend, and has the unusual trait of becoming sweeter as it cools. Well so that means that there is a coffee out there that is a bit like me. I tend to be sweeter when I cool. But what gets me about this particular coffee; is that it does exactly what is on the pack.

Coffee Making Tip of the Day

Coffee Making Tip of the Day No. (10) Did you tamp down your coffee? It’s not too late. Remember that big plastic round piece on the machine low down fits the coffee holder and may, just may be for tamping down the coffee and reducing the water flow in order to extract more of the flavour. I mention this because I was making coffee at someone’s home yesterday using their machine, and they didn’t realise that the plastic ‘thingy’ was for compressing the coffee! So this could be the killer tip of the day if you haven’t been reading the instructions or your coffee machine was passed on second hand by a friend or family member without the paperwork.