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Lots of stuff including Art

Lots of stuff including Art
Newport lad from Crindau, and Ceredigion resident for 27 years: former firefighter Roger Bennett

30 November 2009

Expectations

Expectations, assumptions and opinions probably drive us all. Life is all about decision making and that point is well made in Dr. Viktor Frankl's book (Man's Search for Meaning) that explains Logotherapy in part along with his experiences and those of others during the Holocaust. One thing that was held dear to the victims, was the survival and strength of bonding with family. But I suppose the downside in life along with decision making in general is that you can choose your friends i.e. make the decision to gain and keep their acquaintance, but you cannot choose your neighbours and family.

We have had bad neighbours, well that is a gross understatement, we have actually had in my opinion what I would allege as diabolically bad neighbours. What doesn't surprise me about them, is that they meet the expectations of the Elisian analysis in that you are what your parents were. So bad breeds bad and so on. There are studies that argue that things change at certain ages within your development or if certain impacts change your way of thinking. This could be a traumatic experience that gets you to re-evaluate your life. Frankl appeared to stand up for that argument as well, but understood that the meaning of life is different for each and every one of us.

I have always believed that you have to know where you came from to understand where you are going. We were fortunate that father was a stand up sort of guy, who although Bohemian before his time, also held a strong set of values that put family, King and Country and community at the fore. It would be of no surprise to Norbert Elias to find that I hold the same value set. So, just like bad breeds bad, good breeds good. Mind you, I also believe that we are all have good within ourselves, however one may manifest his/her outer persona. You may be wondering where all of this is leading? Well, it's about family. Not the one that I know but the one that I tracked down during me recent/current ancestral research.

My stand up father had an elder brother. And given that Elias's views are replicated by my behaviour and value set being similar to that of my father, it comes of no surprise to recognise that his brother was also a stand up sort of guy as well. We met his son John and daughter Helen and their respective spouses for lunch only yesterday. It was a cold day that was brightened up by the warmth of their reception and interaction with me, my grandson, wife and two of our daughters. To put it mildly, they were lovely people. Worldly wise, educated and able to engage in social intercourse over a range of diverse topics. I thoroughly enjoyed their flying stories, no not BA and Virgin, but Cessna and other single or twin engine craft with self leveling horizon or not. I have no idea what they thought of my 'fire' stories, but Pauline admitted in the car on the long journey home from Aberporth that her jaw hurt from laughing. Funny really, because the stories in themselves were no laughing matter and related to the few people that I have personally saved during my long career. Lunch was delightful and it was nice to note that they were tolerant of our eighteen month grandson in that he had no intention of sitting still for anyone. Well with a huge hotel and many rooms and several flights of stairs to explore, would you have sat still?

Uncle Len, I salute you. You certainly done a good job bringing up your family and it is delightful to gain their acquaintance, even if it is in their twilight years.
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