I mentioned the private security guard with the gun, who was responsible for amongst other matters; stopping tourists eating nearby or taking photographs of certain statues. But sometimes, you don’t need a person with a gun, for you to know that you shouldn’t take a photo. Walking around the city, any city, is hard thirsty work.In fact it’s so tough, that the next time we are going on holiday I’m flying off to a beach and plonking myself down for three weeks. Now that’s not Pauline’s cup of tea, but ‘horses for courses’ and all of that. Pauline struggles with the city walking, and to be quite honest, so did I in this heat. Our dilemma is that the hotel is some 40 minutes walk from the old city. And being a Cardi, there was little chance of a taxi. Maybe that wasn’t the real dilemma. That could be assigned to returning to the hotel to find that the bar had closed at 2100 and it was now 10pm.
So we walked another hundred metres or so and landed in a bar. The couple at the end of the bar referred to us as being English. The thing was, that I was too tired from the walking and the heat to hit them with a retort “Gaul, non-inglese”.
Now picture this; four tall gaming machines with lights flashing and bells and whistles going. At the top centre if each gaming machine there is a full size dartboard. The dartboard is set out like ours, but they are playing a game that I did not recognise. The place was packed and the players were moving briskly through their turn. The best part was that they had to put coins into each machine in order to play darts! It was really strange, and these were serious players. They were so serious that I likened them to chess players. You guessed, there was no way that I was going to get the camera out. Instead I sat there like a good little boy and downed two pints of some kind of lager.
Wednesday morning brook with a stunning sky and a crushing heat. Time for a shower and for a few moments I felt like Bob Hoskins in Mona-Lisa. You know the scene where he gets wrapped up in the shower curtain in the B&B. It’s not that there is anything wrong with the bath or the shower in this smart hotel. It’s just that thin Italian Centurion thing. Ultra narrow baths, coupled with a basic design flaw. Who places the shower in the middle of a narrow bath and then have a plastic shower curtain? I couldn’t even have the shower head aiming at me. It had to be positioned sideways on. Mind you, that is the position that we found it in, so maybe others had worked out the hydraulics as well.
Reasoning and common sense are traits that we all possess in varying degrees. Sometimes, however hard we try, working things out can be quite difficult. Just ask Pauline how to toast a croissant. She was determined to have one warm with cheese and ham this morning. This is fine if you speak Italian, and you have the common sense to ask the waiter for help. But pretty bad news if, like Pauline, you don’t speak Italian and decide to go for it alone. Toasters are for toast, you know the large hotel type toaster where you place the bread on the revolving platform and it drops off at the end with varying degree of success. Not so cool if you put a sugar coated croissant on the conveyor belt with the heat turned up to 3 and the belt turned down to 1.
For thirty seconds I thought that I was going to have to be re-employed as a firefighter. The breakfast room started to fill with smoke, and forty guests turned to look at Pauline, as two burnt croissants popped off the conveyor belt. Well one popped off, and the other had to be dislodged by Pauline with the bread tongues. She then walked sheepishly back to the table. I heard one little boy say “Mummy, that lady has burnt her cake”. Mum replied “Ssssh, look away”. Still, at least the guests would have something to talk about as they boarded their luxury coach smelling of burnt croissant. I can hear them now “blinking American tourists” or maybe “Ah gee, I wonder which State they’re from”.
It was almost as funny as the bottle of sparkling water that exploded over her two days back. I managed to keep a straight face that time. This time I simply moved tables. No not really, I sat there with a ‘stiff upper lip’ and drank my excellent hot milk and hot coffee. It’s great in Italy. You ask for milky coffee and they bring you a pot of each. The coffee was nicely washed down with the untoasted croissants, bread, cheese, ham, and plums. Plural and not singular as the first one was so good, that I had to pop back and get a second plum.
European touring important points:
Don’t forget to search and print some ideas for each place that you visit
And places to stop off and look at in-between the long hauls
Today’s important points were:
Just less than a pint of lager in Italy cost 4 Euro 50
Check out the croissants there may be two types
Don’t put the sugar coated ones in the toaster
In fact don’t put anything in the toaster other than bread
