There’s one thing that you have to say about each and every one of those that commit to BBC and Lord Sugar show ‘The Apprentice’ (BBC weekdays); they all have belief in themselves. I mean who in their right would during a time of recession give up paid employment to take a chance? It may be the ‘pessimistic me’ but if Lord Sugar called me up and asked me to give up work and appear in the Final of the Apprentice with only one other opponent, then my extremely smart answer would have to be a resounding ‘no’.
It’s not because I retired young and don’t have to work, it’s all about the fact that the other person will win. 'Yes' I do want a job, and I mean forget that I understand planning, strategy, entrepreneurism and the like. It’s just a case that everyone including Lord Sugar will like the other finalist and find a way to let me know that I didn’t get the job. Not because I am unlikeable, it's just how these things go. Now if I am bright enough to recognise that two people isn’t a 50-50 chance, then what are the odds when there are eleven others and a huge number of tasks and board meetings to get through. And if that wasn’t bad enough, you have to shine while nearly everyone else throws a knife or tries to hoist you up onto a meat hook. Well I'm used to that part, in fact I am a seasoned campaigner at dodging knifes thrown by those who ain't that good.
Now I’m also pretty good at identify the patsy at the start of each series. That is the first person to go, every time a new group assembles. Once I picked the correct person simply from the pictures in the 'Radio Times'. Well ‘pretty good’ probably underplays my knack. You see, it’s 100% since the programme began.
Now that looks good on paper, but if we contextualise the statement, then maybe we recognise that when the programme airs, I don’t even know if the ‘boys’ or the ‘girls’ win the first task. I pick the loser within minutes of the programme starting. But during the opening moments of this series, I wavered. I chose two people, no not a boy and a girl, but the eventual victim and his ‘orange’ partner. "Is it an Orange?" response, "Mmmm, I’m not sure". You will have to excuse the paraphrasing, as that’s sort of what I thought that they said when they were together. The most important thing is that those of you who watched the opening episode, will know the two chaps that I mean. Mind you, I selected these two, long before their trip to the market.
My money is on the inventor or the oriental lass. She seems very switched on, he also. He comes across as a bit of an oxymoron in many ways, an inventor who talks sense. ‘Soup Man’ must also be a favourite along with someone who I think is called Gavin. Those of you who follow the Blog know that I am a Briggs Meyer ENTP and not particularly good with names. That’s why I like ‘Sir Alan’, and ‘Lord Sugar’, they are easy to remember and sort of roll off the tongue. I clearly remember ‘Amstrad’ as it stands for ‘Alan Michael Sugar Trading’, and that is something that I can remember and associate with the name.
But for the world of me I simply cannot recall the name of the first episode loser from last night. I know that he used to be an accountant, and I know that he sort of maintained my 100% record, Fred, Frank and Fickle come to mind, but I’m confident that it’s none of those. I also know that he is short as I think that he told us so during the programme, but I am not sure if everyone else heard that passing comment. Now then Lord Sugar, give us a call, I ‘Double Dog Dare You’. And anyone from South Wales knows that you got to do a double dog dare. Can you imagine it; Lord Sugar, the lady on the left, the chap on the right (both of whom come across as being lovely by the way) and me! The problem being of course, after watching every episode and every series, I still don’t know their names. Now ‘Margaret’ that rings a bell, but I don’t think the football club owner is called Margaret, and I don’t think that she bakes either. Tee he hee, me sat in the anti-room; “Lord Sugar will see you now”, “I said, (pausing for emphasis and increasing the volume) Lord Sugar will SEE YOU NOW”. Yeah, as if.
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